surrendering to who I am…

open and let go


I’m still smiling from sex this past weekend with Master.

Sometimes it’s the small things that make me smile…like losing myself in the sumptuous task of sucking His cock and licking His balls. There are times I get frustrated that my jaw and my body position prevent me from having more stamina on any particular day, but otherwise time suspends when I’m worshiping His cock. I feel like I could do it all day.

When he slid His cock inside me, he told me I couldn’t cum until he told me to. My pussy was already wet from licking His cock and balls, and I enjoyed His cock gliding in and out of my well-lubricated pussy. When He added licking and sucking on my nipples to the mix, I felt the orgasm starting to well inside me.

At one point, I let out a big sigh…a reaction a bit out of place in the moment. He asked me what that was. I said, “I’m thinking about baseball,” indicating my attempt to hold my orgasm at bay. He continued licking my nipple as He conveyed that He wasn’t sure that would help me because I’d just start thinking about all those balls and those bats and about being fucked with one. I laughed out loud because – yes – clearly that wasn’t going to work now (or ever again!).

My squirting orgasms feel so amazing. They’re different than a clit orgasm, which tends to feel tingly and electric. Squirting comes from a deeper place inside me. Once I have one, they start coming in waves. I feel them through my entire body. They were particularly deep and intense this time. I enjoy how much my body seems to be opening to allow these incredible sensations. Squirting really is about being open and letting go.

I discovered my ability to squirt about this time last year. It’s wonderful to reflect on the joy of the initial experience and how my exploration has evolved my understanding of my body. It’s a connection and appreciation for my body that has eluded me most of my life.

As I look back and see how far I’ve come in a year, I wonder where I’ll be a year from now as I continue to open up and let go.

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surrendering to who I am…




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