surrendering to who I am…

hands off


I’m on restriction still. I can’t play with my nipples or masturbate to orgasm.

After I wrote my last post, I was quite worked up and asked Master if I could masturbate. He replied,

“I like it when you’re horny. As someone said on The Upper Floor, ‘Let the bitch stew!’

No masturbation today…no orgasms today.”

As usual, this caused me to both stick out my pouty lip and get even more horny!

Well, leave it to a sub to find a loophole. I’m now fascinated with bringing myself to the brink of orgasm without touching myself. I proceeded to work myself up to the verge of two orgasms that afternoon. I told Master of my¬†mischievousness, but then got nervous that perhaps I’d crossed the no masturbation line. He said I’d indeed found the loophole, and that because I didn’t touch myself or have an orgasm I was fine.

When Master and I talked on Monday, we realized I’d gone 10 days. He suggested that the restriction might continue well into next week, and I panicked slightly. He warned me not to beg. It was a luscious mix of sexual frustration and excitement at the thought He might torture me in this way for a while.

He called back later that night and said I could play with my nipples only to orgasm. He didn’t put any restrictions on the number of orgasms, just that I could only play with my nipples (and He was explicit that I couldn’t touch my pussy or play with my dildo in my ass…which is another loophole I thought of invoking until He beat me to the punch with a no).

I came within 15 minutes of playing with my nipples. It wasn’t a race to see how fast I could cum but just an indication of how primed I already was! It felt really good and pretty intense. I waited until I was ready for bed, so the one orgasm was quite satisfying and I didn’t try for more. I slept very well that night.

The next morning when I reported back to Master, he said I was back on restriction until further notice.

These past few days with work have suppressed my libido for now, so the sexual frustration is minimal at the moment. Even in these moments when I’m not totally worked up, I love just the thought that He is in control of my pleasure.

My pussy tingles with every question: How long will this last? Will He allow me an orgasm here and there? When will He give permission next? What will His instructions be? Every thought produces the same feeling as if He was in the room caressing my body, licking my nipples, pulling on my nipple rings or fingering my pussy.

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surrendering to who I am…




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